Day One -Hello, Goodbye

When he logged on to Skype, I felt a wonderful sense of relief. Why? I have no idea. Something to do with the fact that I hadn't seen him since yesterday. Or the day before yesterday, if you are going to nitpick the definition of "seen". We text-chat every day, we voice-talk almost as much. We video each other as often as possible. Which usually means 4 days a week. We may see each other more than most offline couples do. I am greedy. I want more.

He works the afternoon shift, which means he usually gets home after 2 am. I have to be up four hours later to get to my job at a small university. Karma sucks. I have the idea that when he finally sees me with some makeup and during daytime, he will fall in love with me all over again. I usually wait up for him. It seems like the smartest thing to do in this sort of situation.

While I am at work, we text-chat during the half hour when our time frames mesh. Just before he heads out to work and just after I've come back from lunch. And I always feel a wonderful sense of relief when his little icon lights up. Followed by a melancholy surge. I am at work, any number of things can interrupt me when all I want to do is talk to him (he is just a great, great listener)lazily about my life. And any number of things usually do interrupt me. Time goes by way too quickly, the bastard. And before I know it he finds a way to say "Well, I should be heading out".

And in that moment I sort of hate everything. I particularly hate his job. "Quit! Hop a plane! Let me take care of you here!" I said today. And regretted immediately. I love that he is so fiercely independent. He would never go for that.

"All in good time, my love", he said. And he was right. I hated him for that, too